20 important things that no one tells the new moms

motrer

To be a mother is a magical experience. The nice moments that can be shared with your baby have the power to take your breath and to make you ask yourself how could’ve you lived until now without it. But, to be honest, to be a parent is the most difficult job in the world and in the same time you should be ready to become a lifetime part of someone’s life.You can learn and inform yourself during long period of time and to hear different stories and experiences from the other parents. But, up until you taste it on your own and to start walk the path of motherhood then you won’t know what kind of surprises can expect and what problems you are going to have.

Yes, you already know that when you deliver the baby your life’s going to change but here are some things that you might not know:

  1. To come home after the delivery is scary. Until you are in hospital there is someone to teach you how to hold and bath your baby. Also they are there to help you with the breastfeeding and to give you hot meal. The day when you will walk away from the hospital and come back you will have to care by yourself. You will have many emotions – fear, frustrations, and anxiety. You will definitely need some help.
  2. Breastfeeding is hard and doesn’t come always naturally. Everyone will tell you that you have nothing to be afraid of, but for some moms the breastfeeding is a struggle. You can’t even imagine how complicated can be the one thing that should come naturally. Many problems with the breastfeeding, as bleeding and infections of the breasts, not enough milk, can be made by the bad feelings of the mothers.
  3. You will feel pain in the first couple of weeks. Everyone will tell you that the pain will go away when you will see those little hands and fingers and the innocent baby look, but it’s not that simple. Many mothers need 2-3 weeks to be fully recovered and some mothers need as much as two months. The pain is not unbearable because that pain just brought your baby to life.
  4. You will feel like a Hollywood star that is always questioned by reporters. Every day you will need to answer thousands of questions. Some of them will be good, some of them bad and some will be judgmental. “Do you breastfeed your baby?” “Do you drink coffee? Why do you do that when you breastfeed?” “When do you bath your baby?” “How many hours per day did the baby sleep?” “How do you hold the baby while you breastfeed? Why do you hold it like that?” These are some questions that you will have to answer several times a week.
  5. The same tasks will repeat. The first months of being a mother will be filled with commitments that will repeat themselves – changing diapers, breastfeeding, burping, bathing, washing, breastfeeding, burping, changing diapers… Newborns don’t do anything else then sleeping and eating so you can’t expect to lay with your angel and to hug it all day long.
  6. You will not feel bored. To be a mother is not a straight line and monotone activity. The tasks are always changing. Just as you think that you have become an expert in some of the mother tasks before you will be served several new ones.
  7. Your living room will never be clean. The baby arrival will be huge attack on the perfect home that you have had. Carts, diapers, clothes and toys will start to occupy the space. You will not have a minute free time to clean that up and to make the living room to be as before. And you know what; the mess will not bother you. You will get how important is to have everything you need there within your reach.
  8. In the first six months you will think that the divorce is the best thing in that moment. There will be days when you and your partner will not exchange more than a few words. The time that you spend with your partner will be put down only by hugs in the hallway. The deprivation of sleep can make you crazy and in some moments you will scream and be mad without any reason. Sometimes you will think that your marriage is doomed but it will stay strong and you will remember those moments with a smile in the future.
  9. When you will see your husband how he becomes a father you will not have any doubts. You’ll be thankful for every minute that he spends with your baby so you can get your deserved rest. When you will see him how gentle he keeps the baby in his hands all of your bad feelings will be wiped out of your memories.
  10. Your relationship with your mother-in-law will be changed. Your mother-in-law will be your biggest support, your best advisor and the person with which you will learn in a minute to speak on the same language. But there are always some cases that these things never happened. In a moment she can change from being your best from to the most rigorous advisor and judge who will show your every mistake.
  11. Even your baby will sleep during the night you won’t. The questions like “Why the baby isn’t hungry yet?” will not let you sleep in peace. Your eyes will become cats’ eyes that can watch during the night just to be sure that your baby is breathing and that its belly moves up and down.
  12. You will love the moments that you spend under the shower because that time will be the only time that you will have to be by yourself. 99% of the time you will not have a spear minute. You will have a superpowers and will showers yourself, shave yourself, dry yourself in 5 minutes.
  13. You might lose some of your close friends. New mothers don’t have much free time to have social encounters and to go a drink a cup of coffee outside and will only want to talk about babies and that is the reason why many of your friends might go away from you. But don’t worry. The ones that love you the most will be by your side always.
  14. You will hear and watch the same things on TV a hundred times just to calm your baby. You will find out some noises that will calm your baby and you will use them as your weapon. You will not bother to hear them always just because your baby will be calm.
  15. You will not have the same weight as before you were pregnant. Excuse us but you will not be with the same weight as you were before you was pregnant in the moment you deliver your baby. You can’t wear all of your old clothes right away. The stomach will look like you are six months pregnant in the next couple of days. There are only a few lucky women that will have their weight back to normal fast. You must know that you will have to wear your pregnant clothes in the next few weeks after the delivery.
  16. Even you succeed to return your normal weight your body will not be the same. The pregnancy will leave some scars – your body shape will change stretch marks, more cellulite, relaxed breasts etc. Be prepared for changes.
  17. You will have troubles with sleeping while your baby sleeps. When your baby will fall asleep in your head will pass on several activities that will keep you up. You will want to make all of those things and before you have the time to lie down your baby will open its eyes.
  18. You will find yourself competing with some other mothers. New mothers tend to compare the development of their baby with the other babies of the same age. “My baby keeps its head straight.” “My baby is already crawling. Does your baby crawl?” “My baby had its first teeth a month ago.” “I think that my baby will start to speak soon”. This kind of conversations will feed the ego and you will think that your baby has developed fast but sometimes that can scare you because you will be afraid that something is wrong with your baby and that the development is slow.
  19. You will make mistakes. The perfect mothers are a myth. As fast as you accept that the better for you and for your husband and especially for your baby.
  20. Advices that you will get will be contradictory. You will wonder how the doctors can have different opinions. “When the baby will cry at night, go and comfort it.” – will say one doctor and the other will say – “When the baby starts to cry at night leave it like that so it can find out that it needs to fall asleep by itself”. The truth is that you pick your own path. There is no universal manual for taking care of your baby.